This is a body-based, experiential and practical way to solve sex problems beyond talking therapy.
Helping Sex Problems Via Tantric Massage For Women in London
My London practice Tantric Therapy is one of the few UK practices specialised and experienced in this body-based approach to sex therapy.
My extensive 20-year experience with Tantric massage was mainly focused on using it as a method for an alternative sex therapy for women.
Tantric massage and Yoni massage have been a very powerful way for my female clients to improve their sex life and solve sexual difficulties, many times where they failed with other methods.
Over two decades I developed specialised versions of Tantric massage for specific sex problems.
This is an alternative route to formal sex therapy and it improves your sexuality via:
- direct experience
- body healing and
- experiential learning.
This happens:
- in a safe, clearly framed space
- supported with expert guidance
- and advice from an expert in sexuality
You can’t resolve your sex problems by just having a Tantric massage from a ‘masseuse’.
However it is a powerful vehicle in the hands of a genuine expert in sexuality who knows how to work with female sexuality
DISCLAIMER:
This is not a talking therapy or formal psychotherapy / any other ‘therapy’.
In talking therapy you are not allowed to touch the client and you may lead the client into vulnerable mental states. Tantric massage is explicitly based on you receiving sensual / sexual touch – but it is by an expert in sexuality, to give you the right process, guidance and healing experience. You are fully aware and in control. There should be no confusion with conventional talking sex therapy.
See the method below.
How To Solve Your Sex Problems
One of your options for problems in sex is psychotherapy.
Your sex life can may also affected by a diagnosed medical condition, and then you will need medical treatment to address the problem.
However, not all sex problems are effectively addressed by these methods. Not everything is a trauma or an illness.
Many sex problems are a result of misuse: your way of having sex has had a negative effect on your sex life, or you are simply not accessing your sexual energy in the right way with the right understanding, and you get a poor result.
If you educate yourself on a better practice of sex, and you stop using a harmful or ineffective approach – your problems will go away. This could well be a more effective way to give sex therapy than looking for psychological trauma.
Unfortunately all you learn about sex in mainstream culture is gravely misinformed on how female sexuality really works. It is only natural that so many women struggle in it.
If you try to fix this by learning more of the normal approach to sex, it can make matters even worse. You needs to understand how sex needs to change to work well for you.
Many of my female clients who came while looking for sex therapy were convinced they had a lot to heal but actually they didn’t – they just needed to understand how sex really works for women.
Even problems that may appear psychological – such as anxiety about sex, distaste or struggling to connect with sex – often don’t mean you need counselling or to look for a cause in your past. You may have a better remedy and help in a technique – how to be present, how to be positive, how to connect – and then everything may work, you may need no more treatment.
I have also worked with many women for whom counselling and psychotherapy were essential in their problems, but there comes a point where the psychological part is processed yet they can’t move further. They’ve dealt with trauma but don’t know how to create a positive and healthy sex life now, as it doesn’t just snap back. The body remembers and instinctive reactions happen. They feel that the next step is to work directly with the body, responses, comfort and Tantric massage works very well at that stage.
This is why my approach to not see you as a patient to heal.
I don’t see you as broken.
I see you as someone who just needs to learn a better way.
I see you as a learner who improves with my help.
Some people just need a more supported, careful, gradual learning than others.
Which Problems Can We Deal With Via The Tantric Massage?
I have a lot of experience in successfully helping women with the following problems:
- Feeling anxious in sex
- Feeling tense in sex, unable to relax
- Aftermath of negative sexual events
- Mental brakes in sex (self-consciousness, pressure, insecurity, etc)
- Insecurity if you have little sexual experience
- Lack of confidence in sex, worry for your partner’s pleasure
- Being too much in your head during sex
- Focusing too much on pleasing your partner
- Feeling uncomfortable with receiving in sex
- Pain and discomfort during sex
- Difficulty with getting aroused, or enjoying sex
- Low sexual desire, low interest in sex
- Negative body image issues in sex
- Lack of feeling in the body, lack of sensitivity, numbness
- Emotional blocks in sex
- Unhealthy compulsive and addictive patterns in sex
If your have these problems, further down this page you can read more in detail about how Tantric massage can treat it specifically.
I have a lot of experience with these conditions – contact me and I can explain how Tantric massage can help your issue.
While I have experience helping with these more common problems, I can also help with more unusual difficulties and try to find a solution for you.
How Tantric Massage Works To Resolve Sex Problems
Tantric massage is such a powerful and effective method for women because it works in several important directions at the same time.
1. Positive reinforcement through real direct positive experience
How you feel in sex can’t be resolved intellectually. Your body has memories and conditioning – both negative and positive. Talking as a treatment / remedy can sometimes be not enough, as your body then still reacts on its own – with anxiety, shut down, protective numbness, etc.
Many of your sex problems come from negative sexual experiences. Not necessarily traumatic but also unpleasant, superficial, feelings of failure, etc.
The power of Tantric massage is to give you real positive experiences. It won’t be like before, you’re not on your own – we’ll create something new, something more positive with a special approach. Your body learns that sexual feelings are safe, positive, loving, nourishing, beautiful. Your body learns that this is very special and important energy in your life. Gradually this becomes a new reality, your body deeply internalises this new positive feeling of sexuality and it looks forward to it, relaxed and willing. It is basic conditioning through experience.
There is a very real direct communication between my hands and your body during our sessions. Your body receives true healing and loving energy, there is a profound direct effect that has nothing to do with your mind.
This is not a kind of risk you can take in your private life if sex is challenging – it could turn out to be another negative sexual experience with an average person out there or even with your partner. But a Tantric massage is the ideal place for you to start, in a safe and supportive space with expert guidance, acting as true healing.
2. Learning good practices from real experience
As we create these experiences in our sessions, you learn – through direct experience, through practice.
You learn how your body really works, how it needs to be touched, how it can feel and how that is achieved. You learn about the sequence, the different important areas. You learn how to connect well mentally and emotionally, and how to overcome difficult moments.
You can observe the effect of the different approaches in real experience.
You learn about yourself and you become equipped to recreate this healthy and vibrant sexuality on your own in your life.
3. Natural, organic transformation in your body and psyche
When you take the experiential route to improving your sex life, in this process there is organic change. The more of this positive experience you send into your body memory, the more your body opens, flourishes, trusts and feels more confident that this is good and this is beautiful.
There is an organic change that happens deep within your body. Soon you don’t need to focus so much or remember what you are doing – your body feels more sensitive, more alive, more happy and rich in general. Your body finds it easy to be engaged, to awaken, to react easily, to connect.
Whereas before you had to approach your body in a particular way, with certain presence, now your body simply feels a lot, in any kind of sex that you want to have in your life.
4. A direct influx of healing and empowering energy into your life
A Tantric massage is a real experience of filling up with positive sexual energy.
Yes on one hand you are learning how to access that positive sexual energy in our sessions. On the other hand, once you do that during the session, it stays with you after the massage.
This is very much energy work. This nourishing, deep sexual energy stays with you and it often affects women in many positive ways, from self-love and peacefulness, to sensuality, relating and emotional wellbeing.
It all works in a positive cycle – this positive energy that you receive makes you feel better as a woman, and that in turn makes you even more relaxed and vibrant in a sexual moment with someone.
5. A brighter, more meaningful vision of sex to help you
Tantric sexuality is also a new philosophy on sex that you will explore. It is a bright, healthy, positive vision of making love that goes beyond the superficial and shallow experience of normal sex.
We are not trying to get you to be ok with normal – we are trying to help you live it to the full, on the highest level.
Working via the Tantric massage as opposed to sex therapy is about discovering a new level of sexuality. That level will make more sense to you, you will cherish and honour more this beautiful energy in your life.
This will help you to create a more positive relationship with your sexuality.
DISCLAIMER
I make it clear that I am not a qualified and accredited ‘sex therapist’.
In the UK the formal definition of a ‘sex therapist’ is that of being a medical professional or a psychotherapist. These therapists are not allowed physical contact with a client.
I have explained why these approaches may not always work for some people with sex problems, while they are very helpful for others.
I provide solution and / or improvement through an alternative approach to sex therapy that is explicitly based in the client being touched in a sexual / sensual way as a guided and educational experience.
I do not use bodyworks that involve non-sexual touch, nor do I provide talking therapy. I make it clear that it is not accredited as a ‘therapy’.
My approach rests on giving you a safe and supportive environment to learn about a positive sexual approach and receive a healing effect from this journey.
I don’t treat medical conditions or psychological disorders. If you are in need of this kind of treatment, you have to see a qualified professional in those areas.
However, you are welcome to work with me in combination with those professionals to support your work.
Specific Problems And How Tantric Massage Treats Them
Tantric massage is extremely effective at treating most of the common sex problems that women have.
There is a specific approach and method to work with each problem – see below.
I can also work with sex problems that are less common, if you have a very particular situation – from my experience I can put together methods that I used on more common sex problem, to address your specifics.
Feeling disconnected from your body in sex
If you struggle to feel connected to your body during sex, this bodywork is a particularly effective remedy for the disconnect because you work directly with the feelings in your body and establish that connection in practice.
Being too much in your head during sex
If you find it difficult to get out of your head during sex, a Tantric massage is an excellent remedy to treat this issue. It teaches you to be more present in your body as a practical skill.
Can’t relax in sex / can’t let go
If you are someone who finds it difficult to relax and let go in sex, Tantric massage is a very effective solution, as it gives you the practical skills for relaxation of the mind and body.
Focusing excessively on your partner’s pleasure in sex / getting into the mode of performance.
If you habitually perform in sex and focus too much on your partner’s pleasure, Tantric therapy is exceptionally effective specifically to remedy this pattern in women – by teaching you to focus on your own feelings.
Feeling uncomfortable with receiving in sex
If you find that you are a giver but you can’t relax and receive in sex, a Tantric massage is a very effective way to address this – you will learn to focus on your own feelings in comfort and full connection.
Low sexual desire / low sex drive / low interest in sex
Tantric massage is a very effective alternative to sex therapy to increase sex drive and interest in sex for women. You awaken your body with real sexual energy, and you learn how to engage with your body.
You don’t enjoy sex / don’t want to have sex
If you are a woman who generally doesn’t enjoy sex and wants to learn how to enjoy it, Tantric therapy is a direct and practical way forward to help you explore a better feeling.
Problems with arousal
If you generally find it difficult to get aroused, in case of women the most effective remedy to really get to the core of the issue is to learn what your body really needs to come alive – and a Tantric massage will show it through real experience.
You have never had sex
If you are a woman who has never had sex you will have anxiety about sex – Tantric therapy will give you an experiential process to explore your body and reduce that anxiety.
Poor body image in sex / feeling self-conscious
If you feel too self-conscious of how your body looks and this disrupts your enjoyment of sex, Tantric massage is a perfect remedy to help you relax and love your body.
Anxiety in sex / anxiety about sex
If you suffer from sexual anxiety – feeling anxious about having sex, or feeling anxious when you have sex – Tantric method is a powerful technique for women to recondition this response.
Feeling shame in sex
If you feel shame about sex or ashamed when you are having sex, a Tantric massage will teach you how to have a different experience and give you a better vision.
Feeling shut down in sex / feeling shut off
If you feel generally shut down or shut off in sex, then Tantric massage can be a great healing and revitalising process that focuses directly on your body to revitalise your sexual vitality and your sexual feelings.
Fear of penetration / anxiety about intercourse
If you feel fear of penetration or experience anxiety about sexual intercourse, Tantric massage works as an effective alternative to sex therapy that clears this pattern directly from your bodily experience.
Vaginal contraction at penetration – vaginismus
If you suffer from this painful involuntary contraction at penetration, called vaginismus, then Tantric massage can in many cases be a powerful help for this condition – you heal by reconditioning the body response directly.
No feeling / numbness / little sensation in the vagina during sex / penetration / intercourse
Tantric therapy can provide help if you don’t feel much during sex, have little sensation or even feeling completely numb in the vagina during penetration / intercourse.
Pain in the vagina. Painful sex / intercourse / penetration
If you need treatment for vaginal pains, if your sex is painful whether during intercourse or penetration, then Tantric massage can often help – it gives direct healing to the vagina.
Sex addiction in women
If you have compulsive or addictive sexual behaviour, Tantric therapy addresses sex addiction in women at the core – giving you a new vision of healthy, nourishing sexuality.
Not feeling confident in sex
If you have lack of confidence in yourself as a sexual woman, you don’t feel confident during sex, then Tantric massage can help you connect with yourself.
Healing sexual blocks
There is a wide range of blockages that women describe as sexual blocks. Tantric massage can focus on each one specifically and give a powerful healing to resolve most blocks that you feel in sex.
FREE INITIAL CONSULTATION
I understand that this is a big step and you are anxious. It is also hard to decide it on your own whether the Tantric massage is right for you and how it would work – because you don’t know much about this.
I would be very happy to set up a free 20-30 minute phone call where we can talk it through – at no commitment.
All I ask is that you first send me some details on your situation and what you wanted to see me about first, so I can see whether I can help.
This way you can explore the possibility without anything to lose or to risk and then you can decide if it is right for you.
Remember that you can also start with online consultations, and then progress to Tantric massage from there.
