Sex therapy for anxiety in sex and anxiety about sex in women, in London

The alternative to sex therapy that works directly with the body by using Tantric massage is a very effective way to help with sexual anxiety in women – when a woman feels anxious about sex in general, or she feel some form on anxiety when she is having sex.

When women feel anxious in sex or about sex, it manifests as some degree of panic in the moment of sex, even if only mild, confusion about what do do in sex, or you may feel stiff and unable to relax, or you may be in your head unable to concentrate the positive feelings.

Your anxiety about sex may make it difficult to date or continue relationships and you may be avoiding sex with your partners.

It can often be difficult to understand what exactly makes you feel anxious about sex.

Some women feel under pressure about their own performance, worried how sex will go and what they will feel. They may feel self-conscious or insecure about what they give to their partners.

Some women had sexual trauma or sexual abuse and this caused sex to feel threatening, creating anxiety. There can often be a physiological response of panic or shut down in the body.

Some women had general negative sexual experiences in past relationships – e.g. bad sex, or sex with negative emotions in a relationship, and this can cause anxiety that you will have more of those uncomfortable experiences.

Some women are just by nature quite anxious and feel sex as one of the more anxious situations to be in, due to its intimacy and potential vulnerability.

For many women it is also difficult to immediately perceive sex as something positive and nurturing as our culture often promotes edgy, selfish or aggressive version of sex where women can be treated in an insensitive or demeaning manner.

Sometimes it can be useful to understand why you are anxious about sex, other times it is unnecessary. It is important for women to learn how to connect to the sexual moment to prevent general anxiety in sex, or overcome it when it happens. Even if you work out the causes you still need to learn this ability. It is also important to condition your body and mind to sex as something nurturing, loving and positive.

I have worked with many women with this problem. The improvement generally comes easy and is very straightforward, once you approach this directly though the body.

We can help you with sexual anxiety in two ways:

Through a tantric massage appointment

Through a consultation appointment

(if tantric massage is out of your comfort zone)

Please call me to discuss your particular issue. There are variations, and I can give you a more specific explanation of your difficulties, and a more specific solution that will work best for you.

How Tantric massage can help you if you feel anxious in sex / about sex

Reconditioning the instinctive anxious response in your body
A lot of anxiety in sex is a natural response in the body out of your conscious control. You can’t talk to this response.

Often the only way to remedy this anxious response is to give direct positive experience to the body, so that it stops responding negatively. Your nervous mind also gets reconditioned through these positive experiences.

Your body learns from loving nurturing touch in Tantric massage that sexual feelings are ok, they are positive, they are good for you.

Your body heals this inherent anxiety, it learns to trust and to look forward to sexual feelings.


Teaching you to deal with anxiety
There are special mental and emotional techniques in Tantric sexual methods.

With these techniques you can stay more in your body, more connected to the positive feeling, which helps you to prevent the anxiety in sex and eventually you can stay there throughout the sexual experience, without the anxiety arising.

These technique also help you in the moment when you feel anxiety. You can calm yourself down, release the anxious response and get back into the positive feeling to carry on.

Anyone can learn these techniques with some practice.

Creating a new positive vision of sex

There are many ways in which normal sex in our culture neglects a woman’s wellbeing. It can come on as too aggressive, emotionally traumatic, physically uncomfortable, disconnected or pressuring women into doing things they are not comfortable with. This contributes to the negative anticipation of sex and anxiety about sex.

Tantric sexuality is much more aligned with the women’s true physical end emotional needs. It is a vision of sex that is nurturing, loving, and positive for you body and emotions.

You can learn this vision from the real experience – by Tantric massage.

Once you understand how different sexual feelings could be, you will feel more open and trusting towards sex. You will also learn how to create it in your life.

More information on Tantric massage:

Please see booking an appointment for Tantric massage with me in London.

You can also read about Yoni massage therapy for women’s issues.

Tantric massage may seem like a very unusual way to treat your problem, maybe even out of your comfort zone.

Particularly so if you are a woman who suffers from anxiety in sex – doing this kind of session will make you anxious too.

But if you think logically, it is the most effective way if you can just make that step.

In sexuality you can read and talk all you want but when the real moment comes your mind and body react instinctively – from their conditioning, habit, experience. They don’t remember what you talked about, they act from what they felt, what they trust, what they believe from experience.

Working with the body through Tantric massage:
– You learn from real experience in your body – but in a controlled, guided and supportive set up
– Your body receives profound healing from real positive experience
– Your body builds up positive memories and trust
– Your body reconditions to a natural positive response
– Your body is awakened with real sexual energy
– You gain control over your mind and responses in real practice

Working with direct responses of body and mind this is a profound transformation and healing. You become someone different, it’s not just reading or hearing an idea.

I have worked with many women who experienced anxiety in sex, and generally this has been a very straightforward process that has little chance of failing.

What is important when working with a sexual anxiety in women is to set up a very careful process. You are always full in control, able to stop or change the experience at every moment. We gradually condition your body through the safest touch – loving, nurturing, calming – to more and more sexual touch that you learn to perceive as just as positive and nurturing.

I have a well structured process and method to take you through the stages, where you can learn little by little even as you feel anxious, and eventually feel completely comfortable as your natural sexual response.

How my consultations can help you deal with sexual anxiety

When you are healing sexual trauma, it is much more effective to work directly with the body and change its natural responses.

However, if this is too much out of your comfort zone, you can choose to have a consultation appointment with me instead. I can give advice on what you can do at home on your own to deal with your particular difficulties.

As the next step please give me a call to discuss your problem, at no commitment. As with any healing process it is important to understand your specific situation and which solutions may work for you. I will be able to explain a remedy that would fit you in particular.


I make it clear that I am not a qualified and accredited sex therapist.

In the UK the formal definition of a sex therapist is that of being a medical professional or a psychotherapist. These therapists are not allowed physical contact with a client.

I have explained why these approaches are limited for many people with sex problems, while they are very helpful for some.

I provide solution and / or improvement through an alternative approach to sex therapy that is explicitly based in the client being touched in a sexual / sensual way as a guided and educational experience. I do not use bodyworks that involve non-sexual touch, nor do I provide talking therapy. I make it clear that it is not accredited as conventional sex therapy.

My approach rests on giving you a safe and supportive environment to learn about a positive sexual approach and receive a healing effect from this journey.

I don’t treat medical conditions or psychological disorders. If you are in need of this kind of treatment, you have to see a qualified professional in those areas.

However, you are welcome to work with me in combination with those professionals to support your work.


I understand that this is a big step and you are anxious. It is also hard to decide it on your own whether the Tantric massage is right for you and how it would work – because you don’t know much about this.

I would be very happy to set up a free 20-30 minute phone call where we can talk it through – at no commitment.

All I ask is that you first send me some details on your situation and what you wanted to see me about, so I can see whether I can help. I would also need to send you some info on how I currently work, and if you are ok with that I will then be happy to set up a time for us to talk.

This way you can explore the possibility without anything to lose or to risk and then you can decide if it is right for you.

Remember that you can also start with online consultations, and then progress to Tantric massage from there.

Get in touch