Sex therapy and help for being too much in your head during sex, in London

If you have a busy mind during sex, can’t switch off and can’t get out of your head  – you can definitely resolve this with using Tantric massage as an alternative to sex therapy. My unique approach with Tantric therapy is certainly one of the most effective remedies for this problem, with a very high success rate.

Not being able to switch off or get out of your head during sex is a very common problem for women – perhaps the most common.

Your mind gets too busy, overactive, you struggle with staying with your feeling and you can’t relax and get into the sensation.

You might find it difficult to feel enough in your body, or to get aroused. You might feel tense or frustrated during sex, and sex becomes somewhat stressful. You find it difficult to be fully happy and content after sex.



There are two main sources of that noise in your head when you can’t switch off during sex.

One is a basic distraction, an overactive mind that just can’t switch over to sex. You may think about some problems, or work, etc, and struggle to stay in the moment with your partner. We may call this thoughts not relevant to sex. It’s a sort of weakness of attention in sex, and ability you can develop but not very good at yet.

The other reason why you may be in your head too much during sex is a kind of mental noise that feels very relevant to sex itself. You may feel uncomfortable, self-conscious, anxious about your performance, trying to please your partner, trying to do everything right, worried how long you are taking, pressured to get an orgasm, frustrated with your level of arousal, etc.

In general terms – anxieties, worries and pressures about sex itself create a busy mind which doesn’t allow you to enjoy sex.

I have a lot of experience in dealing with this issue and generally have had a high success rate. Practically all my clients suffered from being too much in the head during sex, in one form or another, and my approach has helped where others failed.

If you can’t get out of your head during sex we can work on this issue in two ways:

Through a tantric massage appointment

Through a consultation appointment

(if tantric massage is out of your comfort zone)

Please call me to discuss your particular issue. There are variations, and I can give you a more specific explanation of your difficulties, and a more specific solution that will work best for you.

How Tantric Massage can help for feeling unable to switch off or get out of your head during sex

Learn to get out of your mind and into your body

I have to teach you certain mental techniques. These techniques allow you to shut down the mental noise and become completely present in your body. It is a certain kind of mindfulness – but a special kind, not generic mindfulness you may have read about elsewhere. In sex presence need to be practised in a special way because sex is quite a particular space.

The Tantric massage is an opportunity for you to learn and practise these techniques. As you receive touch and sensation I guide you with my voice how to listen and connect. This way you get real experience and get better at it. You can also observe immediately how this technique enhances and creates feelings in your body.

It is very helpful to practice this new mental approach in a direct body experience like Tantric massage. In this controlled guided practice I can take you through it step by step after which you can carry on developing it on your own in your sex life.

Learn to enjoy sex without pressures and worries

A Tantric massage also teaches you to approach the sexual moment with a different philosophy. In this experience you learn to connect with the present moment, to enjoy sexual energy in your body in all its forms, for the beauty of the moment.

You learn to stop rushing, pushing yourself, performing and achieving – all the stuff that keeps you in your head during sex. You learn to appreciate and value the nourishment in each moment. It becomes a more relaxed approach to sex where you naturally let go of concerns and pressures.

I will create this experience for you in the Tantric massage with a combination of the right quality of sexual sensation, the right sequence and the right mindset which I will guide you through. Your body will learn to organically perceive the sexual moment in this relaxed way, and you will learn how to approach sex with a different attitude.

More information on Tantric massage:

For more information read about therapeutic Tantric massage.

You can also read about Yoni massage therapy.

Tantric massage may seem like a very unusual way to treat your problem, maybe even out of your comfort zone.

But if you think logically, it is the most effective.

In sexuality you can read and talk all you want but when the real moment comes your head just takes over and you can’t do much about it. The more you try to remember what to do correctly, the more you will be in your head.

Working with the body through Tantric massage:
– You learn from real experience in your body – but in a controlled, guided and supportive set up
– You learnt to listen to your body through practice
– You learn to get out of your mind through practice
– Your body and mind recondition to a natural different response

Working with direct responses of body and mind this is a profound transformation and healing. You become someone different, you naturally act in a different way, it’s not just reading or hearing an idea.

Working with direct responses of body and mind this is a profound transformation and healing. It becomes the way you are, your natural state.

Generally I have an extremely high success rate with clients who suffer from busy mind and want to be able to switch off and get out of their head during sex.

These are technique that absolutely anyone can learn successfully with the right instruction and a bit of practice.

Of course for some clients result is immediate while others need a bit more practice, but it’s quite impossible to have no result.

Once you learn the approach in this controlled practice with my guidance, you can continue developing it on your own.

A different sex life is completely possible. You can develop an ability to be fully present in sex, relaxed and appreciative of every moment, feeling every sensation fully without all the background noise.

How consultations can help you deal with this problem

It is very beneficial when you learn this approach through experience. In the controlled practice of Tantric massage i can take you through it step by step while you connect to the real feeling. There is a strong benefit to working with the body directly like this. In this case a tantric massage a much more effective remedy than talking.

However, if this is too much out of your comfort zone, you can choose to have a consultation appointment with me instead – in person or by Skype. I can give advice on what you can do at home on your own to deal with this issue.

As the next step please give me a call to discuss your problem, at no commitment. As with any healing it is important to understand your specific situation and which solutions may work for you. I will be able to explain a remedy that would fit you in particular.


I make it clear that I am not a qualified and accredited sex therapist.

In the UK the formal definition of a sex therapist is that of being a medical professional or a psychotherapist. These therapists are not allowed physical contact with a client.

I have explained why these approaches are limited for many people with sex problems, while they are very helpful for some.

I provide solution and / or improvement through an alternative approach to sex therapy that is explicitly based in the client being touched in a sexual / sensual way as a guided and educational experience. I do not use bodyworks that involve non-sexual touch, nor do I provide talking therapy. I make it clear that it is not accredited as conventional sex therapy.

My approach rests on giving you a safe and supportive environment to learn about a positive sexual approach and receive a healing effect from this journey.

I don’t treat medical conditions or psychological disorders. If you are in need of this kind of treatment, you have to see a qualified professional in those areas.

However, you are welcome to work with me in combination with those professionals to support your work.


I understand that this is a big step and you are anxious. It is also hard to decide it on your own whether the Tantric massage is right for you and how it would work – because you don’t know much about this.

I would be very happy to set up a free 20-30 minute phone call where we can talk it through – at no commitment.

All I ask is that you first send me some details on your situation and what you wanted to see me about, so I can see whether I can help. I would also need to send you some info on how I currently work, and if you are ok with that I will then be happy to set up a time for us to talk.

This way you can explore the possibility without anything to lose or to risk and then you can decide if it is right for you.

Remember that you can also start with online consultations, and then progress to Tantric massage from there.

Get in touch