Most people who come to me to learn about Tantric sexuality find that they are more emotionally disconnected in sex than they would like to be. In fact every couple can feel more emotional connection in sex if they learn how, and a Tantric massage is one of the very useful ways of learning it through experience.
The first reason people often don’t feel an emotional connection in sex is because we never learn to create it.
We feel that if we are in love we will just automatically feel close in sex.
However, once we go into the sexual moment our whole attention switches into a space where there is no emotional connection.
We are used to paying attention only to physical sensation, stimulation, intensity, objectives of reaching an orgasm. We are not aware that we should be paying the same amount of attention to the technique – so to speak – of feeling close in sex.
Just like using the body well, we should be doing this consciously. Instead we have sex as two biological machines, working them and it is no surprise that we can’t feel close in sex. It is just a matter of what we are focusing on.
We need to learn how to combine physical touch with the feeling we have for our partners, in other words how to make love physical. This is a technique you can learn in a Yoni massage, for example, and we can then feel an emotional connection in sex every moment of the way. However, this knowledge is never covered anywhere. Instead we treat physical contact as only physical – stimulating the machine of the body.
We also need to learn how to open our own emotions in sex. We are used to expecting them to happen by themselves and then we are shocked when we can’t feel an emotional connection. But we hold a lot of noise inside, a lot of garbage from the rest of our lives, stress, tiredness, etc. We need to take responsibility for clearing that space and offering our partners a good emotional reception and emotional energy from ourselves. Then we will feel an emotional connection in sex. It is up to use to create it. This is also a very learnable technique that is practiced very much in a guided teaching session of Tantric massage for women.
We have to realize that being good at sex is not just being good at the body. We need to learn how to create the right emotional connection inside ourselves, and how to give it to our partners. This is learned in Tantric massage.
You can very easily change this in your life and have a fulfilling sex with a deep emotional connection and closeness. It is just a matter of learning and is easily accessible. Please read on in the menu at the top of the page.