“My Partner / Boyfriend / Husband Wants Anal Sex but I Don’t Want to”

Many times a woman doesn’t want to have anal sex while her husband or boyfriend persuades her to. This anal sex disagreement is a problem experienced by many women and many women feel insecure about, like they should try to learn to like anal sex and to be open to it.

The important questions to answer is how important is anal sex for YOU for a good sex life, and are you really missing out? Are you falling below the standard of a good female lover who supposedly should enjoy it?

Well the first thing to be clear on is that anal sex is generally not for women. It often doesn’t do anything for women. Men can enjoy receiving anal sex because their prostate is stimulated. But women rarely get anything stimulated through the back passage (although there are always exceptions – women who by a an unusual innervation are sensitive there)

So if your partner / boyfriend / husband wants anal sex but you don’t want to the first question is – does your definition of a good sex life involve both people enjoying it or only him? If it is the former that anal sex is pretty much out, and definitely not an essential in a good sex life.

Now, why does your partner / boyfriend / husband want anal sex so badly? The first most common reason is that it makes it tighter for him and hence a more intense sensation. So the quality of his sex life is determined only by how tightly his penis is gripped. It will never be as tightly gripped in the vagina – this is the whole point of having an elastic and accommodating, lubricated sex organ. Sex is meant to be comfortable like, not extreme. This is a problem with his sensitivity -a and that can be fixed by learning Tantric sexual techniques with coaching in London which will allow him to feel more and enjoy more.

The second reason men tend to insist on anal sex so much is because there is a feeling of something naughty, of possessing, taking, violating something, dominating it. This can be a turn on for both men and women.

The ultimate question is whether you want your sex life to be based on these values, and hence – whether you want to propagate this kind of mentality in your sex life. If instead you believe that sex should involve apart from pleasure and arousal also love, connection, appreciation, relaxation, then not only anal sex is not essential, it is disruptive. There is nothing wrong with saying no to something that gives so little value and clarifying that you want to feel different feelings in sex.


You don’t need to decide on your own if having a tantric
massage is the right thing for you.
It is not your job.
It is my job as a professional to explain to you how
tantric massage can serve you.
It is my job as a professional to reassure you that this
will be useful, safe and comfortable.
As a client, your next step is just to discuss this with me
without making any decisions, and see if this feels right.
There is nothing to lose or to risk – a phone chat is safe and anonymous for you at distance.

Take advantage of my free initial phone consultation