The ideas of Tantric massage for women come loosely from Tantra – an ancient brand of mysticism that appeared in India thousands of years ago.
It was a method for spiritual growth and expansion of consciousness. It was non-dualistic, that is it did not divide the world into opposing good and bad. Rather, everything was seen in full acceptance as experiences to live through and grow through, by entering everything directly with a mystical approach (not to be confused with “mysterious”, mysticism is a method of direct experience rather than philosophy and doctrine).
Tantra never repelled sexuality. It was one of the very few cultures that embraced sex as a large part of us, a part we have to befriend and grow through. It saw sexuality as one of our most potent positive forces, when approached correctly, and while Tantra is not a philosophy based on sex, sex was explored in its spiritual methods.
In this process the Tantrikas found ways to enter sexual energy harmonically to make use of this potent resource for spiritual growth and greater connection. And as a by-product this approach gave them superior sexual states, with unlimited pleasure, fulfilment and higher love connection between partners.
Tantra in its original form disappeared centuries ago. It merged with Hinduism and adopted some of its elements.
It is important to understand, however, that the genuine Tantric sexual practice had nothing to do with personal relationships or having a sex life. They used sex as a tool for spiritual practice. The higher sexual states and superior sexual energy are a by product of their exploration, not the goal.
As such, pure Tantra teaching is not relevant to a modern couple if they are looking to improve their relationship, their sex life and to discover more together sexually. Only the general direction is relevant, which you have to complement with the right sexual practice.
Tantra also didn’t leave much behind in the sense of sexual technique. It left a few ideas, a few basic sexual energy practices which are not enough to build your sex life from, but it did give our Western culture a new approach to build on.
In the West, it was the sexuality vision of that philosophy that attracted the most attention. Apart from Tao, Tantra was the only culture that offered a perspective to embrace our sex spiritually and to expand it to new horizons from the mediocre sex life that we normally have.
While some teachers of Tantra as a global spiritual path through life assert that it is not about sex, many others are transmitting its sexual message, accessible to anyone regardless of life philosophy and religious views.
A wide range of practitioners, mainly those with their own understanding of the pearls of wisdom, survived through the centuries. Their methods and approaches vary a lot, these days there is no unifying authority on Tantric sexuality.
Also important to understand is that, because authentic Tantra left so little in terms of practical technique, most practitioners of Tantra today teach their own technique based on Tantric ideas. Tantra has given Western sexuality teachers a direction, but what is taught now is not some authentic technique from thousands of years back, but the result of personal research and exploration of modern practitioners to complete what Tantra would have taught to the couples of today.
Coaching and teaching of Tantric sex these days is an umbrella term for a variety of approaches to modern sexuality that work in the direction of taking sex from the mainstream basic technique to a more conscious, energy-based, wellbeing oriented sexuality. But the approaches are mostly modern developments by professionals working in this direction, not a catalog of technique that has survived from ancient times.
There are a variety of approaches you can take to learn Tantric sexuality.
Couples can come for a consultation or a practical workshop.
Women can take a more experiential route – transforming sexuality through direct bodywork of Tantric massage in my London practice, and focusing specifically on opening their sexual energy through the professional Yoni massage offered in London.